Ok, for some time I’ve been thinking about this but not got round to writing it. I am so mind-numbed after last nights First Great Western Rail experience that I can’t do the ‘homework’ set a couple of weeks ago and just need to splurge out some stuff that requires no rational and linear thinking..
The GWR experience involves travelling back from Worcester to Banbury by train ( via Oxford to avoid the Bus Replacement Service that is in place due to landslip north of Banbury…I got caught in that one last Saturday night…and the consequent BRS!!!!)
Don’t you just love the jolly music!!!
Here is an ambient track I made whilst I was on this BRS…more jolliness… ooh that old camararderie!
Quite a contrast to the experiences of the hundreds of displaced people getting on and off the buses weary at the beginning and end of their extra long days….. One woman I met had left Hull at 5am to get to a meeting in Oxford for 9am. She was on the train with me at 11am, not yet in Oxford and had to return to Hull that night!!
This time I arrived at Evesham after 30 minutes gentle journey and remained there in a carriage for 90 minutes until we ( 20+ innocents) were left outside a cold (shut) station waiting another hour for a coach ( well 3!) to arrive to drive us to Oxford.
Some poor people still had to make their way to London on trains disrupted because of previous landslide…2 people at Oxford to sort out the chaos. I blagged a cab for the 20 miles home to Banbury otherwise I would have been on YET ANOTHER RBS which would have had me arrive in Banbury after midnight! 6 hours from Worcester to Banbury!!
This is a record even for me who is a veteran of RBS’s from Arriva trains Wales and others.
One day I’ll write a blog about my train experiences including being stuck in lavatory ( Yes Really) for most of the journey from Marylebone and emerging to the cheers of a carriage full of commuters after several blokes kicked the door in and unscrewed the lock.
Also another recording of the train journey from Banbury to Oxford on Wednesday 4th Feb. for the meeting of CDAN described in the post above.
Lots of people who had got off the BRS and joined the train to Oxford already tired at the beginning of the day.
Back to the Blog.
When I started this I was reluctant toy use it as a notepad for myself and really saw it’s purpose as , I guess, a tool of documentation and for assessment for the MA rather than an arena for thought and personal reflection.
Over the months it has changed I think and I’ve been ware of my relationship to it and also other people’s ( some of my followers)
One friend…not a fellow student or colleague, became concerned by some of my darker personal thoughts and commented ( much to my further distress) on the Comments section of the Blog. She saw my internal wrangling with some of the topics raised by my reading and needed to comfort me!
Lovely but not appropriate I thought. This is a place for me to bare my soul and analyse/ reflect… but it is not a personal journal with a cover and a lock that I can put in a drawer ( unless I change the settings to Private). Her concern shocked and surprised me, particularly as it was visible on the blog.
Another colleague and her brother ( past collaborators!) also Follow and talk to me about what I am doing when we meet. It disturbs me…the fact that I haven’t told them… not really…I just wrote it on my blog…for the mA and all that…I didn’t really expect them to read it and take any notice!
Reflecting a little on these feelings, I am beginning to understand more about myself and the way I make work. I have discussed before the fact that sometimes I want to make work that is almost invisible.
That an audience hardly seems relevant. A formal audience is absolutely not what Iwant…or rather what I don’t want ( can I be that specific…?) That the action, once done is done and that is the work.
That the rest is documentation. I have realised that the use of Social Media and Sharing , makes me feel uncomfortable. Despite my Twitter and websites, I share carefully and it does not come naturally.. I am a ‘single’ or only child and as a child was always told, when introduced to people, that I must therefore be spoilt and be unable to share! I realise now that to some extent this is true. I do not easily share thought and ideas. I often expect others to know what I am thinking or imagining without making it clear or visible. I find sharing these thought difficult and so the blog is probably restricted. I do not think that people will find these interesting or useful to them and yet I am happy to use others information and imagery…
Do I want people to know what I am thinking? What do I want to make visible and public? I have may thoughts which are jotted down on scraps of paper to add to this blog but they never make it this far.
PHOTO OF NOTES!! insert later
This week I have been to two long meetings with colleagues from Arts backgrounds and , as this is unusual for me, found it very difficult to describe myself and my ‘practices’ in full. When I did manage it it was in an area where we already shared ‘like mind’ and it was hugely beneficial and I feel as if I am on ‘ the right track’ …more on this later.
More about Sharing as I have been thinking about using Social Media to distribute my work rather than in a physical exhibition space. I’ve been investigating Snapchat and Vine as spaces for this.Both because of their ephemeral nature… However.
Of course, as a 55+ yr old woman my attempts to find friends on Snapchat have been relatively unsuccessful!
One invited friend said ‘ Don’t do Snap chat but lets meet for coffee’, my youngest son blocked me when he realised who it was, and i am left with one friend and my eldest son…
Maybe I do want another audience but I can’t get easily into that digital Social Space…? It has made me consider accessibility to digital spaces and the factors which restrict that.
Again, the geography and psycho-geography of logging in to these spaces.
I think I’ll have to read more Lefebvre. Some of this ties in with my next posts I hope…. This link for Snapchat is a wonderful example of very slick hyper and remediation which I will be talking about in a post soon.